Frozen Beauty...

I have this insane urge to shake you till your insides rattle!!! Hit you till you understand. Kick you…slap you. Drum some sense in you. Make you realize. I get so disgusted with you; I feel…I feel like just picking you up and banging you against the wall. And then I am shocked at the violence I am capable of. The kind of hostility you can evoke in me. And then I look at you. Your sheer beauty. The perfection. And oh just 6 years old!! (she turned 6 last December 19th Dec ’04) But such a lady…so poised…so collected…
I can’t blame her you know. She is mute. Can't talk, can't articulate. And I think it is one of the most terrible things to happen to even your worse enemy!!! She is soooo innocent. Sitting quiet all day...so silent...so cold. At times it sends chills through me.... Absolutely no feelings. NOTHING!!!?? Just the hard exterior covering the hideously slow insides. I somehow could never get the hang of what makes her tick or work. And she has always remained a mystery to even my compwalla.
Yes people the cause of my distress and yours on occasion...I present to you my pain, my joy, my addiction...FROZEN BEAUTY...MY COMP!!! This is the third time I am rebooting her. Have called her all the names under the sun. But her calm amazes me. It just surprises me-her patience, her composure. Or I suppse she gets back to me by just freezing. Hanging right in the middle of me doing something verryyyy important. Now look…I am disconnected from the internet. Now the techies will tell me it isn’t FB (Frozen Beauty) but something else like my internet –now lets just not get into that or I will just break down and weep.
But I refuse to listen to reason. That FB is growing old and I need to put her to rest. People have told me, “Shipra its time for a revival…an upgrade. And finally I decided yes it was time to upgrade. But then the cruel blow of destiny and my papa decided to get another computer. BABE—we call her. Oh yeah, she is sleek and smart and fast and oh so professional…I was telling a friend the other day…and my poor FB cant just stand the comparison. Not that I am comparing lemme tell you. FB is homey just blending in with the surroundings…the mess of my room—I told my friend.
And then I realized…doesn’t matter I have to reboot her 5 times a day. She eats up my most important documents. She can’t bear the load the pressure, the grind I put her through. But her grit, her determination amazes me. My compwalla’s hands are not tender. And he opens her so brutally( NO PUN) and she bears it all. My FB. I admire her fighting spirit. Her “never-say-die” attitude. Her gumption, her guts. Living in the same household as BABE isn’t easy. Babe is egoistic when my FB is altruistic. Babe is coldly efficient when my FB wheezes and sneezes. But then I love her…I love u FB!!!So next time people…before cursing FB…remember she will get back at you by not sending your messages at all. She might be innocent and homey but she has to survive and survive she does…SURVIVE SHE DOES!!!!