A Drop Of Elixir ..........

Just enough to last a lifetime or enough to last the lifetime an eternity ...That again is a matter of opinion

Monday, May 30, 2005

I feel like a rant!!

I CANT STAND IT ANYMORE!!! This...THIS goody goody life!!!! *contorting face to look frustrated*
uff...and for that I think I am going to rant. About anything!! About everything!!!
These are the times my folks dread. I don’t blame them either. Its just that there is nothing happening in life that is exciting which is pissing me off. Life is getting stagnant. Stagnant nahi…I might be even regressing. Now this is shitty aint it!!! Nothing new is happening. Everything is going just smooth. My life is picture perfect *urrgggghhhh*

And it really isn’t. Picture perfect I mean. There are those small things I don’t pay attention to just because I am too happy to bother with them. Yes people 24*7!!! Yes I kno…I could give my dog diabetes with my oh-so-amazing-it-is perception of life. Candy sweet, rozy glasses n such shit.
And so the shitty mood that I am in,I am gonna whine. Whine?? No not whine. Scream, screech, rant. About all the sad things, irritating technology, friends who ditch you and the fact that looking pretty aint easy!!!

Like right now, I decided I will get a Tag Board installed. And I did get it installed. But then I wont get the desired colour. So now that is wat it is. Some stupid colour pink.

Speaking of pink, my office building is pink too. Now this is the limit. And I changed my template. Not because I was sick of pink, (psst actually I was, but id b damned if I admit it loud to the glee of my guy frds who detest pink) there are still traces of silly gurlie pink in my stupid blog ….but coz my profile n archive n fav list wud go rite in the bottom of the page. It was okie till I wanted to add the tag board.
Now I dono how good the taggie thingy will work. But then I don’t even know if people will just scroll down to pen a nice few words about my dumb blog. SOOO I had to have the rest of the shit up beside my posts. And so the change in the template.

It aint like the template is not good or sumthing. But like IJ said, its too plain. There is excess of nothing but words. Now again I have to go looking for sum lessons in HTML to make my blog look a lil life like. Some people liked my template…so I think ill just stuff it.

Enough crying about how technology is such a royal pain in the @$$. It is different matter that I am a techietard. But whoever said venting out your frustrations have to be done in a just and fair manner??!!

Next I am going to talk about how I wake up these days. Rocky-my dog, now knows I wake up at around 7 in the morn. And he has, it seems, decided since my snooze clock and my stupid cell phone is not enough to wake the sleeping beauty, he will do the honours. And how pray tell me does he do that?? By licking my face. that is how I wake up in the mornings. With doggy drool all over my face and neck. It is his love and affection says maa. *rolling eyes* these days I tell you, it aint as simple to get a dog and expect him to flatter your ego. Big sad eyes and a lolling tongue. BAH gone are those days when going to my aunts would mean have her dog tail you. No pun.
Rocky doesn’t want me to hug n pet him when I feel like it. He wants it done when HE is in the mood. *rolling eyes with an exaggerated sigh* Talk of being pricey.

Ha…pricey reminds me of purva. She is in town these days. Me in my sweetly innocent way made a lot of plans on how we were to spend our time with her. Rohini, purv and me. But it turns out madam purv has her plans already…AND THOSE…if I might add, do not include us. Oh I don’t delude myself by thinking I am the center of the universe for all and sundry but her plans…hold your breath…include showing her pune pals the city of Mumbai. Yes people, she plans to spend her meager holiday time in Mumbai being with the people she lives with in pune. Talk of friends…
I told her that. It rankled obviously. And smart n sassy that she is…she turned the tables on me by sounding hurt and disappointed. Saying 3 years ought to count for some trust.
Finally I did go visit her the whole of Sunday…my precious Sunday, only the working people will know how much Sunday is cherished. N I aint even well. Hurmp!!!!

Ive got bad cold. And it would have been okie if things were only till that!! But I got my nose pierced a fortnite ago. Ahem It looks mega sexy and darned ethnic. Also I take this opportunity to tell that my mom comin bak frm blore got me a solitaire stud. Which winks like a star when it catches light *lil jig like joey does*
Hmm so since I got my nose pierced, I need to be extra careful of women who in their over eager need of expressing, gesticulate. At times even I have narrowly avoided collision of my hands wid my nose. Now in all this, I land up wid a horrid cold and terrible cough. It gets so darned yucky. Blowing and wiping your nose. This is one instance I didn’t foresee while listing the pros and cons of piercing my nose.
Anyways, I in my always-optimistic way know that colds don’t last, but sexy looks do. And my gold nose ring sure looks sexy.

Lol. Look at my pathetic condition…nothing happening in my life has reduced my blog post to talks of pierced nose and snot!!! I think I just mite be tempted to hook up with some loser just to get sum excitement in life. Yeah, its that bad!!!

Something analogous
Masochist *whining, begging, pleading*: gimme pain, hurt me, insult me!!!!!!
Sadist *wid an evil grin*: he he nope. I won’t!!

Thursday, May 26, 2005

My Silence

And i have this page open since half hour and I dont know what I have to write about. No, I dont suppose this is writer's block. Simply because it is not that i cant think of what to write...but coz i dont feel like writing.

Now the most obvious question would be so why do I bother?? Lol, announcing that there are my beautiful people who read my blogs and I cant disappoint them would be me blowing my own trumpet, so would calling myself sexy and beautiful...
I wouldnt have to blow my own trumpet if somebody else did it for me. But then no one else will and a gurl has to do what a gurl has to do.
And that is precisely what i am doing...no, no!! Not praising myself (though i very well can!! coz this is my blog n all that shit, but i wont. Notice my modesty and my humble nature )i would have completed the statement but I kinda forgot what i was gonna say. So I will stuff it till the time when it comes back to me.

And this is precisely what my problem is says a friend. He in his im-too-brilliant-for-my-pants style told me the other that speech is silver...but silence, honey, is gold. I didnt utter a word simply because saying anything would mean he is right and id be damned if id help him in proving him rite. So i stayed mum. Errmm if i were really true to myself and there is just one place I am true to myself...no it aint my blog, but the loo. (offtrack: I think it does sound nice huh saying when Im going outta subject neways...i was talking about philosophising in the loo So here goes :Ships Gyaan - Loo not only answers nature's call but spiritual call as well. that was shitty, pun intended!! )
So i was saying...being true to myself, i have to agree i was not mum simply coz i didnt want to prove him right, though it featured largly in the scheme of things, more cause it was almost 3 in the night n I had work to do the next day and he was in his “im-giving-gyaan-to-u-lowly-mortal”, was one of those philosophical cum racist cum personal opinion typa discussion. And I didnt say a word. It cost me my dear life *now im exaggerating* but i stayed shut.

We were talking of herd mentality and groups and people and safety net and all that. Tell me who would be interested in all that at 3? I told himi wasnt and started talking about something else. It was then when he told me the statement which was to lead to my nirvana *rolling eyes* The fact that i rattle on and on and on and dont let him talk. So from a dialogue, apparently APPARENTLY!!! i make it a monologue. No points for guessing who does all the talking and he accused...mind you it’s a heavy word- ACCUSED me of not letting the other person talk or waiting for me to think what im talking about. Now that rankled and I got mad. I mean that is offensive rite… and so I, in my most innocent, humblest, hurtest tone till date, told him...my words are for others...and my silence is for me.

Have to trust me when I say this...i didnt expect the reaction the statement would recieve. He was stumped!!! lol...and silent.

And I think finally that is what this post is gonna be about!! My silence. And the fact that *warning: this is getting philosophical* that speech is cheap and so is free, but silence comes at a cost and is dear.
I think in the heat of the moment...ahem...and my recitation to silent shounak, i hit the truth. Another Gyaan moment about discoveries made by chance and such...
Suitably recovered shouny told me that in that case i shouldnt have a lot of time for myself because he doesnt think I am silent at all. Sarcasm...the pompous ass!!!
I decided i wont get defensive and justify. And rudely told him I am n ot answerable to anybody about my silence and the lack of it. Truth is, it rankled. The fact that you need to defend urself in front of your best pal.

And so i did the next best thing...hehe to show him that i can be silent if i choose to. And that was soo typically gurlie...now my head bows down in shame *no it doesnt* I banged the phone on him and didnt talk to him for a couple o days...then he said sorry n shit...I AM A GURL!!! mutated gene et al

Makes me wonder...speech is silver n silence is gold, then again...liking silver better than gold...to each his own I say *wink* (silver it is for me!!!)

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Oh I Love My Life :D

I take it back. I take it all back!!!
Every whine, every rant, every crib i made last week about my job, my work, the place its located, my collegues, my boss even. Both online and offline.
Coz the simple fact is it rocks!!!! MY JOB ROCKS!!!!
And this is not just coz o all da worldly wisdom and gyaan given by all you beautiful * ahem* people about how positive attitude and good outlook would help me feel good about my work, its because my job is jus fantabulous.

And ill tell you gladly what is it that over these past two weeks made me realise i just might be the most blessed person in the world after ...after...umm...after the most blessed person.
# I start my day at 7 30 in the morning. which is good coz i used to be up by 6 to go to college. sigh college. I miss college man!!!!

# Icome in royal shitty ride all da way to office. Its sooo dusty...da roads!!! U cant take the rick for the same reason. Because by the time you reach office, there is 2 millimeter thick cake of mud on your body. Or the parts (of ur bod) exposed to the relentless sun and heat and dirt!! So you obviously have to take the bus. Bus is cheaper too. actually goin on and stating precisely how cheap it is would be....aah what the heck, its Rs. 4 and 50 paise *grin*

# I come to office and open my dabba...oh yeah!!! I get tiffin from home *implying im jassi types* amd start hogging. Not for anyother reason but the fact that i have no time to eat breakfast because i wake up late.

#Then I open the newspaper. Yes people i read newspapers n all these days. ECONOMIC TIMES!!! no less.

# Now I open my mail box, check stuff...read mails, delete forwards, reply to some...dont blog though. Stil lnot in the groove of actually writing about my innate feelings when there is Akon playing "im so lonely" in the background.

#Finally I decide its about time i start working because at the end of the day...or maybe in the beginning as the case may be here, all those moral science lessons by Ms. Monica Lopez about work being worship and dedication n focus is not lost on me. i always iterate im a achcha bachcha.

By 2. 30- 3, im brain dead. I cant work after lunch. Not for anyother reason but for the fact that the work is soo intense, i just cant do it. And you all know how it is for a novice like me. *sheepish*

So after 3 i officially stop working and remember all the people ivelost contact with, all the net friends who were in my iggy bin, all those other sodding piece of asses who are working and all and sundry I manage to catch online or even on the phone.

So that is how ive been doing since last two weeks. Working, learning grasping stuff and basically slogging my precious ass off.
Now someof my oh-so-dear friends in the blogworld or otherwise wouldnt really agree with me on the slogging part. And here is where I feel I just HAVE to defend myself because Ive more than compensated for the way i have lived my life. So in these 2 weeks, Ive worked more than I have in the 20 years of my existance. And that is a very heavy statement.

Ill spare all the details on the gyaan of how it is like working and the accountablility and responsibility and all that s hit that i thought was all fancy talk and didnt care a f*** actually do exist.
I cant really crib. Seriously. Because then that would make me an ungrateful wretch.
Flawless Comp *who is yet to be christened * and superfast internet connecti0n,
Private phoneline- completely my own...
Coffee five times a day *ghar pe im allowed only 3*
Music on request or get ur own songs funda,
5 days a week job from 9 30 to 5 30
Amazing collegues *n i aint saying this coz more than half o my co workers read my blog ;-)*
A Boss who got married this monday and so is outta town-yet not bossy and is a fun guy. I am talking -taking us out for a movie as a treat of him getting married.* now this is for if he ever reads my posts ;-)*
Zilch pressure as far as work per se goes,
A-M-A-Z-I-N-G scope of learning when I actually decide to honour the concept of work,

And all in all the chance of doing what I think I would wanna do the rest of my life and what I have been doing all along so far- Talking to people, getting to know them, basically flaunting my superior communication skills.
And if people arent absodamnlutely jealous ALREADY!!!! I ahem get to talk to supersexy sounding guys wid superintelligent brains (now that gotta b da clincher)*wink*

Jokes apart, its great for the simple reason that as long as I do what Im supposed to do, no one cares a rats ass to what ELSE I do. And it is not sumthing everyone can boast of, atleast not on their firstest job ever. I suppose a little later, i will be shown the bigger uglier picture, but for now Im content and happy with my life.
Abhi Ive finished my cadburys 5 Star which I might add *offended* does not have the gooey caramel and is not even cold!!!! And i need to go home to my FB who is developing inferiority complex.
So far...it is like a dream come true. oh and...I LOVE MY LIFE!!!!! *grin*

Psst: La Devil is inPune, pursuing her higher studies...she people has always been miss brains.She is someone who solves math coz she had nothing better to do. i can safely say this without being killed is because she has no net access for sometime. So she will be back with a bang and a lot o fun stories in a while... meanwhile erratica writes pretty cool stuff too...-ahem this aint marketing...its jus...aah well...

Thursday, May 12, 2005

My First Week Of Working...

And that was the delusion I lived in for the twenty years of my life. And I was sooo cruelly disillusioned this week that I could weep. Yes my people…. there the authority o queen Sheba in play monday was like my first day of my very first job of my life!!!!
I wish I had stories of adventure and excitement…but the fact is, the first day of my first job sucked. It’s the presumptions that’s the killer. Now that can b ship’s gyaan- It’s the presumptions that’s the killer. I presumed its the first day and so it will be a half day..like in skool. BAH what half day, the boss made us sit till later the quitting time.
I suppose I should start from the inception. It is the story that started bout a couple o months ago. I get a call for interview. I go n blabber shit. Now its common knowledge that I blabber but not shit always. Esp not in any of the interviews I d been to.

But this one was different. It was like I jus couldn’t seem to stop. Anyways after a devastating attempt at redeeming myself in front o da interviewer…I came bak home dejectd and sad, cursing my runaway mouth. And mom’s poking in the eye or more apt in the mouth bout how I cant stop yakking didn’t help my cause any.

Then like after a couple o months I get a call saying I have been shortlisted and then about being selected. That was like the time when I couldn’t seem to sit still and I was floating in cloud nine. N then there were gloatful nudges to to mom. And sticking out the tongue to sis.

ZOOM BAK TO PRESENT: more like to this Monday.

First day naa…I thought its gonna b like it was in skool and college. Half day. Only da giving of timetable and then letting us off. Did it happen here?? Just saying no n leaving it at that is doing injustice to my first day of firstest job. So im gonna go into total detail of precisely how shitty it was. It was like being thrown into the water and asked to swim. Swim phir bhi is okie…I would have flailed my limbs n surivie. But imagine asking you to swim among the sharks in da name of teaching you how to swim. In such a condition there is little you can do coz ur already in the water, so u pray to God that they get da fellow inductee and not you and that at night you will light a candle in da name of the dearly departed. And I did just that. From the class one, ive been avoiding anything to do with numbers and money *ofcourse unless its to spend* like a plague. And here I am working for something id sworn my life on im never gonna tolerate. So first day the first three hours I had to work on removing the mental block that I suck at finance. So it was understanding wat is corporate banking and corporate finance and corporate tax…equity and derivatives and by mid noon, I was brain dead!!! And that people doesn’t happen very often.

But the next day I caught up. And the day went very smooth but the traffic spoilt it all. I had to walk up the entire way to the train station. And the walk people is for 45 minutes. No issues really, help me tone down…now that I aint gymming anymore.
The nxt day was very smooth. More like uneventful. Then my boss decided that it was going too easy for the four of us, yesterday he gave us a 2 hour long session on how inqusitivity is dead among the youngsters today, how there is no learning attitude and that bar a few the rest o the people’s English sux too!!! And blah blah blah blah. And that is all we needed. Today he’s said he wont be coming to office.

He is getting married next week. So he wont be around next week I guess. Good thing. Not that he behaves like an ogre but is too astute for our liking. Though im in his good books, he doesn’t taunt me…jus lightly pulls my leg n all…gave me da bestest computer n all. So life as far as reporting to the senior is concerned everything is hunky dory.

Collegues are also real neat
So far so good, one week down…God alone knows how many more to go.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

And Some Women Are Bitches

What I am going to say in this post is strictly against the code of the sisterhood convention. It strictly says in the rulebook that thou shalt never leak out secrets. And in a blogpost, it is blasphemy. And when I say this statement, people ask me about sisterhood convention. Many of the ladies don’t attend these unions. It is a group. A fraternity for women. Where they discuss just about everything under the sun and of course related to women.
Yes people, here is where I learnt the importance of words-nasty mouth-ruckus that it creates cardinal sin to frame a sentence using these words, so the nxt best thing and fine-tuned my fashion sense to an art and learnt the number of times I should bat my eye lashes to attract a specific male attention.

So I was talking about the sisterhood fraternity. And the fact that many women think they are above such mortal or women things. Of course we are not talking of the tomboys of this world those by default are not eligible for the society. Not offence really ladies, but fact is fact and I should call a spade a spade.

Here I am talking of the women who act feminist but think machoist. Ahem machoist is …err…the opposite of feminist?? Coined by yours truly.
So its about those women who are written bout in mills and boon. The ladies who always wanna snare the hero from the heroine. Those women who simper and coo and bat their eyelashes… there is a difference in their batting lemme tell you guys. We come across them all over the place. In classrooms, on blogs, in chat rooms, traveling in a bus, a train, some are unfortunate to have em as neighbours even!!!

The personality types. They are sooo obvious. And can be slotted as the bitches. Erratica was telling us the other day of a lady who works with her. A typical specimen of a bitch. The I-am-oh-so-sexy-but-so-darned-vulnerable types. Showing a non existent cleavage, smiling perfectly so that the fang canines don’t show, eyes twinkling and nose twitching. Devious females. Lemme elaborate on such types. They are the one who are over friendly on the second meeting. Are caring and considerate. So sweet that even butter wont melt in their beautiful mouths. Just until there is an audience. Their boyfriends, other gurls…anybody but the two of you. And this is only for the honorary people of the same gender.
But then they are like umm the phrase in hindi… “meethi choori” literal translation would be sweet knife. The kill. Little LITTLE jibes, sweet insults, cute put downs. And in all this they look as angelic as they come. The epitome of feminity. Pulchritude coming out in waves. Fairy incarnate. BAH!! *rolling eyes* Lol. I know at this point I am oozing disgust and repulse but I can't help it!!!

Now that the type is defined and the characteristics talked of, lemme tell you how to identify these people from other normal women. They are easily identifiable. One look at them and people get more awed than warmed.
Now like any species, these errmm ladies too have different types:
There are the intelligent types. Who know everything about everything. They have something to say about everything. Everything in the world happening to anybody has happened to them. They are the ones who have been there done that.
Ref to context: ahem never mind this one.

Then there are the supercool babes. They surprisingly have done all the “in” things, even before they were “in”. stylish to the point of being obscene, these females are the futuristic ones. They will tell you about the hippest places in Mumbai that cost the earth and the earth knows you can't afford. They will tell of the famous people they know and are in contact with. They will tell you about how they rebel. About how defiant they are and break the rules but still the people around love them because…no points for guessing my lovelies, they are the sexy vulnerable babes!!! And we all have enough guy friends to know that such a combination is irresistible to the male of the human species.
Ref to context: umm almost half the females fall under this one but the one everyone in blogworld knows of is my classmate the famous P_y_l.

Then there are the blatantly bitchy types. They are my favourites. Because they are in your face. They know and you know that both of you dislike each other but still are sweet to each other and then cuss at each other. I like these ladies because they are as close to being honest bitches as they come. You know where you stand with them, and that is under their feet if they have their way. But since it all is mutual and out in the open…alls well that ends well.
Ref to context: Shruti. She, people is a lady with whom I have a love hate relationship. A gurl I genuinely love and dislike actively. And love all the more for this open bitchiness she displays.

And there are so many more types. But bitchiness apart, talking, walking, being friends with such women is always dicey. It isn’t about backstabbing or being waspish. Its about the lack of openness and friendliness without the ego and one upmanship that comes with it. Eerr maybe it is about being waspish and mean to your own friend.
It is true that there is a bit of one upmanship here and there in every relationship but then it all is in the spirit of the friendship. I get along very well with both the sexes. And most of the people are beautiful. The guys as much fun as the gurls. But then invariably there is that one soul who is bent on putting you down. Depending upon the sex of the person, brutally if it a guy and gently if it’s a gurl, but down nonetheless. And it can't be denied that women are born with a highly honed sixth sense *wink* so when it is the men, it becomes antagonism and with women it becomes subtle games of words and insults. Believe me it does happen.

But then I think what fun without such people. Everything would be goody goody. And we all agree too much sweet is gagging but too much spice is never unwelcome?? They amuse, they engage, they tickle and they irritate. And that is what makes them worthy of a blog post.

And I think after all that analysis done on bitches…ahem…I too am guilty…. *devilish grin*