And Some Women Are Bitches

What I am going to say in this post is strictly against the code of the sisterhood convention. It strictly says in the rulebook that thou shalt never leak out secrets. And in a blogpost, it is blasphemy. And when I say this statement, people ask me about sisterhood convention. Many of the ladies don’t attend these unions. It is a group. A fraternity for women. Where they discuss just about everything under the sun and of course related to women.
Yes people, here is where I learnt the importance of words-nasty mouth-ruckus that it creates cardinal sin to frame a sentence using these words, so the nxt best thing and fine-tuned my fashion sense to an art and learnt the number of times I should bat my eye lashes to attract a specific male attention.

So I was talking about the sisterhood fraternity. And the fact that many women think they are above such mortal or women things. Of course we are not talking of the tomboys of this world those by default are not eligible for the society. Not offence really ladies, but fact is fact and I should call a spade a spade.

Here I am talking of the women who act feminist but think machoist. Ahem machoist is …err…the opposite of feminist?? Coined by yours truly.
So its about those women who are written bout in mills and boon. The ladies who always wanna snare the hero from the heroine. Those women who simper and coo and bat their eyelashes… there is a difference in their batting lemme tell you guys. We come across them all over the place. In classrooms, on blogs, in chat rooms, traveling in a bus, a train, some are unfortunate to have em as neighbours even!!!

The personality types. They are sooo obvious. And can be slotted as the bitches. Erratica was telling us the other day of a lady who works with her. A typical specimen of a bitch. The I-am-oh-so-sexy-but-so-darned-vulnerable types. Showing a non existent cleavage, smiling perfectly so that the fang canines don’t show, eyes twinkling and nose twitching. Devious females. Lemme elaborate on such types. They are the one who are over friendly on the second meeting. Are caring and considerate. So sweet that even butter wont melt in their beautiful mouths. Just until there is an audience. Their boyfriends, other gurls…anybody but the two of you. And this is only for the honorary people of the same gender.
But then they are like umm the phrase in hindi… “meethi choori” literal translation would be sweet knife. The kill. Little LITTLE jibes, sweet insults, cute put downs. And in all this they look as angelic as they come. The epitome of feminity. Pulchritude coming out in waves. Fairy incarnate. BAH!! *rolling eyes* Lol. I know at this point I am oozing disgust and repulse but I can't help it!!!

Now that the type is defined and the characteristics talked of, lemme tell you how to identify these people from other normal women. They are easily identifiable. One look at them and people get more awed than warmed.
Now like any species, these errmm ladies too have different types:
There are the intelligent types. Who know everything about everything. They have something to say about everything. Everything in the world happening to anybody has happened to them. They are the ones who have been there done that.
Ref to context: ahem never mind this one.

Then there are the supercool babes. They surprisingly have done all the “in” things, even before they were “in”. stylish to the point of being obscene, these females are the futuristic ones. They will tell you about the hippest places in Mumbai that cost the earth and the earth knows you can't afford. They will tell of the famous people they know and are in contact with. They will tell you about how they rebel. About how defiant they are and break the rules but still the people around love them because…no points for guessing my lovelies, they are the sexy vulnerable babes!!! And we all have enough guy friends to know that such a combination is irresistible to the male of the human species.
Ref to context: umm almost half the females fall under this one but the one everyone in blogworld knows of is my classmate the famous P_y_l.

Then there are the blatantly bitchy types. They are my favourites. Because they are in your face. They know and you know that both of you dislike each other but still are sweet to each other and then cuss at each other. I like these ladies because they are as close to being honest bitches as they come. You know where you stand with them, and that is under their feet if they have their way. But since it all is mutual and out in the open…alls well that ends well.
Ref to context: Shruti. She, people is a lady with whom I have a love hate relationship. A gurl I genuinely love and dislike actively. And love all the more for this open bitchiness she displays.

And there are so many more types. But bitchiness apart, talking, walking, being friends with such women is always dicey. It isn’t about backstabbing or being waspish. Its about the lack of openness and friendliness without the ego and one upmanship that comes with it. Eerr maybe it is about being waspish and mean to your own friend.
It is true that there is a bit of one upmanship here and there in every relationship but then it all is in the spirit of the friendship. I get along very well with both the sexes. And most of the people are beautiful. The guys as much fun as the gurls. But then invariably there is that one soul who is bent on putting you down. Depending upon the sex of the person, brutally if it a guy and gently if it’s a gurl, but down nonetheless. And it can't be denied that women are born with a highly honed sixth sense *wink* so when it is the men, it becomes antagonism and with women it becomes subtle games of words and insults. Believe me it does happen.

But then I think what fun without such people. Everything would be goody goody. And we all agree too much sweet is gagging but too much spice is never unwelcome?? They amuse, they engage, they tickle and they irritate. And that is what makes them worthy of a blog post.

And I think after all that analysis done on bitches…ahem…I too am guilty…. *devilish grin*